Our Latest Adventure
Nandini has lice.
There, I said it. It's out there. There's no going back.
Nandini has lice. You know... lice. Nits. Cooties.
My little girl has cooties.
Ugh! This is so mortifying. How did she get them? How is it that she survived three years living in an orphanage with a hundred other kids without so much as a bug looking at her... but then we adopt her, bring her to Texas, and she gets lice?? How is that?
Where did they come from? We homeschool. It's not like she's gallivanting all over the hallways of our nearest public school. We haven't even been anywhere this week. Well... except for one place... the place where all disease runs rampant...
Walmart.
I'm going to blame it on Walmart. We've been 3 times this week. Maybe this is God's way of reminding me that I need to stick to our budget. Do you think He'd use lice as a way of reeling in my Walmart expeditions? Because if so, it's working. I don't ever want to step foot in there again.
Guess what? It worked, God!
Sigh.
This is so humiliating. So, this is how it all came into play...
We were at LifeGroup yesterday with our church. No big deal. Just sitting around chilling. We'd just sang Happy Birthday to Cherie. We were passing out the cake. And I happened to ask if someone knew how to check for lice because I'd noticed that Nandini had been scratching her head.
Now, in all honesty, I was fully expecting someone to tell me that I was being paranoid. That she had dry scalp and I needed to switch shampoos. But, nope. Plain as daylight. She had a critter infestation.
I would have so loved to blame it on the orphanage. To say, "yep, I bet she picked it up in India"... but, nooooooooooooo, I couldn't do that, could I? She's been here 4 1/2 months. It's plain and simple that she got it here. And. I. Wanted. To. Die. right on the spot. Right then and there.
So, I had to leave Eli at Dreama's and then take Nandini with me to Walmart to get some Rid treatment. It was awful. I walked in and felt like everyone knew that my little girl had nits. Like there was a flashing neon sign around us. Like there was a giant "L" stamped on our foreheads.
And there Nandini was.. sitting in the cart scratching her head like a monkey looking for dinner.
It was so obvious.
I called Sim from the store - completely freaking out - and he said I was making a mountain out of a molehill. But really, isn't that my speciality? Isn't that what I do best? I mean, if there was a college degree called Molehill/Mountain Making, I would have majored in it and graduated Summa Cum Laude.
He said that it's no big deal, that pretty much EVERYONE gets lice at one point in their life. But you know what.. everyone poops, too, but that's not something you go advertising on a T-shirt, is it? No. Some things are best left private and unassumed.
And lice is no exception.
And, for the record, yes, I do understand the irony of that statement... as I'm on here airing my dirty lice laundry. But pretty much everyone who reads this blog was actually there last night to watch the Nit News unfold.. so, really, I'm just rehashing old events.
Where was I? Oh yeah. Walmart. Dirty, dirty little Walmart. And guess what you can't find at Walmart? Lice treatment. Ya know why? Because they're sold out! I didn't know whether to laugh or cry at that. Should I find great comfort in knowing that I live in an community that's overrun by cooties? Or should I cry at the fact that I live in a community that's overrun by cooties? Either way.. it didn't make me feel less ashamed. Especially when I had to wait in that long pharmacy line to inquire about whether or not they were sold out or if they actually keep the lice treatment behind the counter.
Now.. it was after 8 o'clock. The pharmacy should've closed an hour ago. But they were open... and there were a ton of people hanging around waiting for their prescriptions. So, we're waiting in line and Nandi is sitting there scratching her head like a little girl who has lice.. and I'm standing there with my head hung in shame and suddenly she starts grabbing boxes off the shelf. Little boxes for hemorrhoid treatment. Now, why on earth would they keep their Preparation H and other boxes right there by the pharmacy line? That's the most public place on earth. I mean, I don't have hemorrhoids, but if I did, I wouldn't want to weed my way through that hostile pharmacy line, stand there in the open, and scour the shelves for some treatment to take care of my 'roids. Heck no. I'd want them to hide those boxes in the back corner where they put all the tampons and pregnancy tests. Who stocks those shelves? Who designs the layout for Walmart? They should know better than that.
So, Nandi starts grabbing the boxes - as I'm not already mortified enough - and I have to scoot the basket over so that her octopus arms are out reach and I tell her she can't have those. "Why?" Oh yeah... she's 3. She's Queen of the Why's. "Why? Why Mommy? Why? Why? Why?" I explain to her that she just can't have them and she screams at the top of her lungs.. "WHYYYYYY??" which causes everyone to turn around and look at her. And what do they see? A little girl smiling innocently in the shopping cart with her hands in her hair scratching away.
I swear that some of them moved their carts away from us. Mothers shielded their children. People who'd been standing in line for hours actually left in fear that one of Nandu's nits would make an aerodynamic leap in the air and attach itself firmly into their scalp.
Okay, that last part didn't actually happen. Well, it could have. I don't know. I couldn't raise my eyes off the floor long enough to look.
Anyway, I found out that they had one bottle left of Rid stuff on the shelf... and several bottles of non-toxic stuff on the shelf... so I got the poison-y chemical stuff for Nandi and Eli and the other for Noah... and yes, I know that's not exactly fair, but I can't take the chance with Noah... and I can't take the chance that it doesn't work with Nandi and Eli.... so I spent $46 bucks on lice treatment, shampoo and a new hairbrush and off we went back to LifeGroup.
And that's it. We treated Nandini and Eli - got them all fixed up. We got back home and Sim was doing the laundry. Actually, Sim was PO'ed and doing the laundry. He is fully playing the Lice Card and saying that he is dead positive that the kids got it from all the garage sale (insert any foul word of choice) that I keep bringing home. So, now, I'm banned from Walmart and garage sales. And, then, we stayed up half the night washing four sets of bedding.
And, tonight, we get to spend a romantic night checking each other for nits. Yep, there's nothing destined to bring a husband and wife closer together than combing through each others hair looking for lice. Oh, I just can't wait!
Blech.
So, anyway, to all those at LifeGroup last night... I'm sorry that I had to dash out of there in such a hurry and interrupt the word of God with our lice escapade. To Dreama... thank you so much for being such a trooper and for letting us use your bathroom as a defestation campground. And thank you for delousing Eli and for not wearing rubber gloves while you did it. I think that would have just killed me.
To Cherie, I'm sorry that our nits ruined your birthday. I'm sure no one was able to enjoy their cake after that. And I'm sorry that your birthday will forever be remembered as the day that Nandini came down with lice. But, hey, I can guarantee that I'll never forget your birthday as long as I live.
To Julie.. I'm sorry you had to delouse your 4 year old - just in case. But on the brightside, isn't it awesome that he and Eli are so close that if one of them comes down with nits then the other one might too? Isn't it every Mom's dream that their kids have such close friends?
Abby, I'm sorry I snapped at you and told you to run inside and wash your hands after you tousled Nandini's hair. I hope I didn't scare you or make you think that I'm a mean old lady. Honestly, I was just lookin' out for ya.
And Mike. I know you tried to handle it all with a smile, but I'm pretty sure you sprayed your entire house with that Rid spray after we left. And I wouldn't be surprised if you started a bonfire in your backyard and burned all the towels we used in our attempts to delouse. Also, I bet a hundred bucks that you complained to Dreama last night that you couldn't sleep because you were up all night itching.
Speaking of itching.. Nandi just woke up and is scratching her head. What??? Doesn't that stuff die? Die Lice! Die!!!
Off to google.....
Leslie
There, I said it. It's out there. There's no going back.
Nandini has lice. You know... lice. Nits. Cooties.
My little girl has cooties.
Ugh! This is so mortifying. How did she get them? How is it that she survived three years living in an orphanage with a hundred other kids without so much as a bug looking at her... but then we adopt her, bring her to Texas, and she gets lice?? How is that?
Where did they come from? We homeschool. It's not like she's gallivanting all over the hallways of our nearest public school. We haven't even been anywhere this week. Well... except for one place... the place where all disease runs rampant...
Walmart.
I'm going to blame it on Walmart. We've been 3 times this week. Maybe this is God's way of reminding me that I need to stick to our budget. Do you think He'd use lice as a way of reeling in my Walmart expeditions? Because if so, it's working. I don't ever want to step foot in there again.
Guess what? It worked, God!
Sigh.
This is so humiliating. So, this is how it all came into play...
We were at LifeGroup yesterday with our church. No big deal. Just sitting around chilling. We'd just sang Happy Birthday to Cherie. We were passing out the cake. And I happened to ask if someone knew how to check for lice because I'd noticed that Nandini had been scratching her head.
Now, in all honesty, I was fully expecting someone to tell me that I was being paranoid. That she had dry scalp and I needed to switch shampoos. But, nope. Plain as daylight. She had a critter infestation.
I would have so loved to blame it on the orphanage. To say, "yep, I bet she picked it up in India"... but, nooooooooooooo, I couldn't do that, could I? She's been here 4 1/2 months. It's plain and simple that she got it here. And. I. Wanted. To. Die. right on the spot. Right then and there.
So, I had to leave Eli at Dreama's and then take Nandini with me to Walmart to get some Rid treatment. It was awful. I walked in and felt like everyone knew that my little girl had nits. Like there was a flashing neon sign around us. Like there was a giant "L" stamped on our foreheads.
And there Nandini was.. sitting in the cart scratching her head like a monkey looking for dinner.
It was so obvious.
I called Sim from the store - completely freaking out - and he said I was making a mountain out of a molehill. But really, isn't that my speciality? Isn't that what I do best? I mean, if there was a college degree called Molehill/Mountain Making, I would have majored in it and graduated Summa Cum Laude.
He said that it's no big deal, that pretty much EVERYONE gets lice at one point in their life. But you know what.. everyone poops, too, but that's not something you go advertising on a T-shirt, is it? No. Some things are best left private and unassumed.
And lice is no exception.
And, for the record, yes, I do understand the irony of that statement... as I'm on here airing my dirty lice laundry. But pretty much everyone who reads this blog was actually there last night to watch the Nit News unfold.. so, really, I'm just rehashing old events.
Where was I? Oh yeah. Walmart. Dirty, dirty little Walmart. And guess what you can't find at Walmart? Lice treatment. Ya know why? Because they're sold out! I didn't know whether to laugh or cry at that. Should I find great comfort in knowing that I live in an community that's overrun by cooties? Or should I cry at the fact that I live in a community that's overrun by cooties? Either way.. it didn't make me feel less ashamed. Especially when I had to wait in that long pharmacy line to inquire about whether or not they were sold out or if they actually keep the lice treatment behind the counter.
Now.. it was after 8 o'clock. The pharmacy should've closed an hour ago. But they were open... and there were a ton of people hanging around waiting for their prescriptions. So, we're waiting in line and Nandi is sitting there scratching her head like a little girl who has lice.. and I'm standing there with my head hung in shame and suddenly she starts grabbing boxes off the shelf. Little boxes for hemorrhoid treatment. Now, why on earth would they keep their Preparation H and other boxes right there by the pharmacy line? That's the most public place on earth. I mean, I don't have hemorrhoids, but if I did, I wouldn't want to weed my way through that hostile pharmacy line, stand there in the open, and scour the shelves for some treatment to take care of my 'roids. Heck no. I'd want them to hide those boxes in the back corner where they put all the tampons and pregnancy tests. Who stocks those shelves? Who designs the layout for Walmart? They should know better than that.
So, Nandi starts grabbing the boxes - as I'm not already mortified enough - and I have to scoot the basket over so that her octopus arms are out reach and I tell her she can't have those. "Why?" Oh yeah... she's 3. She's Queen of the Why's. "Why? Why Mommy? Why? Why? Why?" I explain to her that she just can't have them and she screams at the top of her lungs.. "WHYYYYYY??" which causes everyone to turn around and look at her. And what do they see? A little girl smiling innocently in the shopping cart with her hands in her hair scratching away.
I swear that some of them moved their carts away from us. Mothers shielded their children. People who'd been standing in line for hours actually left in fear that one of Nandu's nits would make an aerodynamic leap in the air and attach itself firmly into their scalp.
Okay, that last part didn't actually happen. Well, it could have. I don't know. I couldn't raise my eyes off the floor long enough to look.
Anyway, I found out that they had one bottle left of Rid stuff on the shelf... and several bottles of non-toxic stuff on the shelf... so I got the poison-y chemical stuff for Nandi and Eli and the other for Noah... and yes, I know that's not exactly fair, but I can't take the chance with Noah... and I can't take the chance that it doesn't work with Nandi and Eli.... so I spent $46 bucks on lice treatment, shampoo and a new hairbrush and off we went back to LifeGroup.
And that's it. We treated Nandini and Eli - got them all fixed up. We got back home and Sim was doing the laundry. Actually, Sim was PO'ed and doing the laundry. He is fully playing the Lice Card and saying that he is dead positive that the kids got it from all the garage sale (insert any foul word of choice) that I keep bringing home. So, now, I'm banned from Walmart and garage sales. And, then, we stayed up half the night washing four sets of bedding.
And, tonight, we get to spend a romantic night checking each other for nits. Yep, there's nothing destined to bring a husband and wife closer together than combing through each others hair looking for lice. Oh, I just can't wait!
Blech.
So, anyway, to all those at LifeGroup last night... I'm sorry that I had to dash out of there in such a hurry and interrupt the word of God with our lice escapade. To Dreama... thank you so much for being such a trooper and for letting us use your bathroom as a defestation campground. And thank you for delousing Eli and for not wearing rubber gloves while you did it. I think that would have just killed me.
To Cherie, I'm sorry that our nits ruined your birthday. I'm sure no one was able to enjoy their cake after that. And I'm sorry that your birthday will forever be remembered as the day that Nandini came down with lice. But, hey, I can guarantee that I'll never forget your birthday as long as I live.
To Julie.. I'm sorry you had to delouse your 4 year old - just in case. But on the brightside, isn't it awesome that he and Eli are so close that if one of them comes down with nits then the other one might too? Isn't it every Mom's dream that their kids have such close friends?
Abby, I'm sorry I snapped at you and told you to run inside and wash your hands after you tousled Nandini's hair. I hope I didn't scare you or make you think that I'm a mean old lady. Honestly, I was just lookin' out for ya.
And Mike. I know you tried to handle it all with a smile, but I'm pretty sure you sprayed your entire house with that Rid spray after we left. And I wouldn't be surprised if you started a bonfire in your backyard and burned all the towels we used in our attempts to delouse. Also, I bet a hundred bucks that you complained to Dreama last night that you couldn't sleep because you were up all night itching.
Speaking of itching.. Nandi just woke up and is scratching her head. What??? Doesn't that stuff die? Die Lice! Die!!!
Off to google.....
Leslie
Comments
Take care
Michelle
You can always tell who has yet to have lice touch their lives yet - they are the freaker-outers. It's just a matter of time before their kid shares a comb on picture day or they try on a scarf or hat in Wal Mart ... or yeah ... could've totally been something from a garage sale. You just never know!
When I was a kid, my mom was cleaning the church one day, and my brothers and I did what all good pastor's kids do - we were getting into stuff: old puppets and props from Easter pageants of yore. We found this old woman wig, and took turns wearing it.
Yup. It was the great lice battle of 1979.
Some lice can be resistant and they are a little bigoted; they favor dark, thicker hair! Keep up with the google searches and you'll lick those nits!
You're not icky.
Not fun!! But, this too shall pass.
oh - and - NOT YOUR FAULT!! :)
Michelle, a friend of mine told me about that episode and said it was great.. and that the Countess handled it much better than I did. Okay - now that's scary!! I need to reel in my emotions a bit. :-)
Christine... so YOU'RE the one who started the great lice battle of 1979! :-) Did you start it in 1984, too? 'Cuz that's when I got it from sharing a curling iron with another girl in gym class.
Yep, I've had it, too... but for some reason seeing my kids get it totally freaked me out. I'm much better now. :-)
Lee, I'm not good at vigilance, either! That's my big downfall. But I think I must've spent about 5 hours picking through Nandini's hair last night - and thanking God that it hasn't grown out that much yet... can you imagine if it was waist-long? Yikes! I'm just trying to everything I can so that Noah won't get it. Oh. and Me too. I don't want those critters in my hair! :-)
Hi Melissa! Hey, don't worry. I bet you didn't put your mom through any torture. I'm pretty sure she is probably much more sane and logical than I am.. and I bet it didn't freak her out - not even once. And now that the kids have it, I'm betting that I'll handle it much more skillfully next time. (But there'd better not be a next time!!) :-)
Leslie
Your welcome! And really...everyone goes thru this at least once, twice, three times in their life with their kids!