Breaking Up
Dear Computer,
I know it's been a while since I last sat down and visited you. It's just... wait, no, don't cry, Computer. Come on, now. It's okay. Really. No, no. It's not you. It's me. It's just... well, I don't really know how to say this. Okay, I'm just going to say it.
I've found someone new.
There. It's out there. It's done. Now you know.
But I know you already know. You've met her quite a few times. And, yes, she doesn't really like you. Okay, she actually can't stand you. And, yes, it's true. She starts whining and screaming everytime I come near you. But I love her. I do. I'm crazy about her.
Wait. No, of course not! This has nothing to do with your age. Yeah, so. She is quite a few years younger than you - but you know better than that. So what if your monitor is dusty and your keyboard is faded. You know I don't care. You know me better than that.
Okay, well, yeah, you also thought I'd never leave you... okay, well. I see your point.
Seriously. Come on, Computer. It has NOTHING to do with your age. Hey, we all get older. I can certainly attest to that.
Really, it's just... okay, stop it. It has nothing to do with your size. Yeah, I can't exactly sit you on my lap and take you to the park or to the cafe - but you know I wouldn't ever want to use you in public. Come on. Yeah, so you're a bit bulky and immobile - but you know I love you. You've been able to satisfy me in so many ways over the years. I could never trade you in for a younger, smaller model.
Except that I have? Well, yeah, sort of - but not really, Computer.
You know I love you - it's just... I love her more. There I said it. I do. I'm crazy about her. True... she's mucky. Walks - well, runs - around with wild hair and sticky hands and markers on her face. She's always dirty and getting into things. But I'm crazy about her. I am.
True. True. She is jealous of you and has a quick temper. I'm sorry she hit you the other day. And, yeah, it wasn't nice of her to spill her drink on you. No.. I don't think she did it on purpose. Really? You think she did? Hmmmm... well, maybe.
Look. The point is that she needs me right now. She wants me to hold her all the time. ALL. THE. TIME. But who cares, right? We waited a long time for her - and she came halfway around the world to be with us. It's just going to take some time. And, honestly, she'll come to love you as much as I do. I can guarantee that in 10 years she'll want to be with you so much that you'll get sick of seeing her.
Oh, Computer. This is so hard for me. I do miss you so much. Everytime I walk by you, my fingers get all tingly. They long to type on your keyboard. And my eyes.... oh, how they want to gaze upon your monitor. Oh my goodness - all the wonderful things that monitor has shown me over the years.
But I can't. Not right now.
Don't worry, Computer. I'll never fully leave you. Yeah, it's true that your cousin, Tele Vision, went away on vacation and hasn't come back yet - but don't go thinking the same thing will happen to you. And, yeah, it's true that your brother, Tele Phone, has seen quite a bit of abuse lately - but, hey, your big size comes in handy! I promise there's no way that The New One in My Life will be throwing you around and biting on you. Don't worry. I've got your back.
Listen, I don't know when we'll meet again... maybe tonight? Tomorrow? Next week? Next month? I just have to do some planning, but maybe I can arrange a Late Night Rendevous or an Early Morning Quickie. All I know is that we'll have to be very, very, very quiet. We don't want the New One to know. But, I promise.. sometime soon... I'll come pay you a visit, sit down, and turn you on.
Until we meet again, please know that I'm thinking of you and remembering all the wonderful times we had together. I love you.
Your's faithfully,
Leslie
I know it's been a while since I last sat down and visited you. It's just... wait, no, don't cry, Computer. Come on, now. It's okay. Really. No, no. It's not you. It's me. It's just... well, I don't really know how to say this. Okay, I'm just going to say it.
I've found someone new.
There. It's out there. It's done. Now you know.
But I know you already know. You've met her quite a few times. And, yes, she doesn't really like you. Okay, she actually can't stand you. And, yes, it's true. She starts whining and screaming everytime I come near you. But I love her. I do. I'm crazy about her.
Wait. No, of course not! This has nothing to do with your age. Yeah, so. She is quite a few years younger than you - but you know better than that. So what if your monitor is dusty and your keyboard is faded. You know I don't care. You know me better than that.
Okay, well, yeah, you also thought I'd never leave you... okay, well. I see your point.
Seriously. Come on, Computer. It has NOTHING to do with your age. Hey, we all get older. I can certainly attest to that.
Really, it's just... okay, stop it. It has nothing to do with your size. Yeah, I can't exactly sit you on my lap and take you to the park or to the cafe - but you know I wouldn't ever want to use you in public. Come on. Yeah, so you're a bit bulky and immobile - but you know I love you. You've been able to satisfy me in so many ways over the years. I could never trade you in for a younger, smaller model.
Except that I have? Well, yeah, sort of - but not really, Computer.
You know I love you - it's just... I love her more. There I said it. I do. I'm crazy about her. True... she's mucky. Walks - well, runs - around with wild hair and sticky hands and markers on her face. She's always dirty and getting into things. But I'm crazy about her. I am.
True. True. She is jealous of you and has a quick temper. I'm sorry she hit you the other day. And, yeah, it wasn't nice of her to spill her drink on you. No.. I don't think she did it on purpose. Really? You think she did? Hmmmm... well, maybe.
Look. The point is that she needs me right now. She wants me to hold her all the time. ALL. THE. TIME. But who cares, right? We waited a long time for her - and she came halfway around the world to be with us. It's just going to take some time. And, honestly, she'll come to love you as much as I do. I can guarantee that in 10 years she'll want to be with you so much that you'll get sick of seeing her.
Oh, Computer. This is so hard for me. I do miss you so much. Everytime I walk by you, my fingers get all tingly. They long to type on your keyboard. And my eyes.... oh, how they want to gaze upon your monitor. Oh my goodness - all the wonderful things that monitor has shown me over the years.
But I can't. Not right now.
Don't worry, Computer. I'll never fully leave you. Yeah, it's true that your cousin, Tele Vision, went away on vacation and hasn't come back yet - but don't go thinking the same thing will happen to you. And, yeah, it's true that your brother, Tele Phone, has seen quite a bit of abuse lately - but, hey, your big size comes in handy! I promise there's no way that The New One in My Life will be throwing you around and biting on you. Don't worry. I've got your back.
Listen, I don't know when we'll meet again... maybe tonight? Tomorrow? Next week? Next month? I just have to do some planning, but maybe I can arrange a Late Night Rendevous or an Early Morning Quickie. All I know is that we'll have to be very, very, very quiet. We don't want the New One to know. But, I promise.. sometime soon... I'll come pay you a visit, sit down, and turn you on.
Until we meet again, please know that I'm thinking of you and remembering all the wonderful times we had together. I love you.
Your's faithfully,
Leslie
Comments
Girl, you missed your calling!
Carrie Bradshaw had better be glad you're in GBC and not NYC......other wise she'd have to cut back on her Manolo's!
Mommy-hood should always come first............they grow up way to fast..I know !(boo-hoo)
Give them all a hug for me!
Jayne