Recovering Noah

Christine blogged today about her favorite songs to sing when she cuddles up with her children who have RAD (Reactive Attachment Disorder). It made me think of MY favorite song that I listen to when I'm sad, down, or about to go insane from being bit and pinched all day. I also sing it to the kids when they're sad. Well, okay, I'm a terrible singer. I can't hit those high notes. Or those low notes. Or, actually, any notes at all. So, I've downloaded it on the computer and just turn up the volume. It's Josh Groban's "You Are Loved". I think it is THE most beautiful song ever. Eli introduced me to it. Yes, Eli. He heard it on the radio one day and declared it the BESTEST SONG HE'S EVER IN THE WHOLE WIDE BIG WIDE BIG WORLD HEARD. His words exactly. Here it is. Hope you enjoy it, too.

Time-out is actually working great!! Consistency is definitely the key. We're down to 3-5 minutes at a time. The kids are actually behaving about 75% of the time - which is a lot better than 5%!!. And Eli actually WALKED away from Nandi yesterday when she intentionally started hassling him. That is nothing short of a miracle. Oh! And Nandi is no longer testing us by getting off the couch every 2 seconds. Once she's in time-out, she actually sits still and behaves. Now.. if only it were that easy to get her INTO time-out...

Okay, I deleted my recent post about the neighbor's kid. It was really mean of me to even write about it. I need to be a grown-up and either get over it or talk to his parents about it. I'm still weirded out about the whole thing, but don't need to go on here cracking jokes about a kid. That's just mean-spirited - and I don't want to be thought of like that. Sooooo.. for all of you who read the post, I apologize. For those of you who didn't... well, I'm sure your curiousity is piqued... but this case is now closed. Leslie

We mailed in Nandini's latest report to our adoption agency yesterday. In the 7 months since she's been home, she's gained 3.8 pounds and grown 3.8 inches. How weird & cool is that? She now tips the scales at 25.8 pounds. Still a skinny minny, but not too shabby for a child who only lives off shrimp, tomatoes, jelly sandwiches, and turnip greens. She's also 38.8 inches. That REALLY surprised us. She seems so little. And two of those inches have been in the last month!! Her dresses all hit well above the knee now. And while we're at it, I decided to weigh the boys. Eli is now 40.8 pounds. I honestly never thought I'd live to see the day when one of my children hit 40 pounds. Truly never thought it was gonna happen. And Noah is 37.8 pounds. Now THAT is something to do a happy dance over. He weighed 24 pounds from the time he was 18 months old until the month before he turned 4. (He was really sick during that time). And now, he's 37.8 pounds. Granted, that...

Yesterday, I blogged about some of the issues we've been facing with Nandini, and I thought I would try to explain a little bit more about it. Someone asked if Nandini has attachment issues. Well, the truth is, we don't know. I guess if you look at everything carefully and gave it a clinical definition, then, yes, she would probably fall on an attachment disorder spectrum. At the same time, though, we do believe she has truly bonded with us. For those of you who kept up with our adoption journey when we were in India last November, you might recall that Nandini grieved heavily when we took her away from BSSK (her orphanage). Although it was really hard at the time, deep down, I was relieved because it meant that she had formed a bond with her caregivers. And I think one of the greatest fears in adoption is that you'll adopt a child who was so neglected early in life that they aren't able to form attachments. However, even though Nandini has bonded, she has experienced a...

Yesterday was actually a good day with Nandini. I only got bit twice, pinched twice, slapped once, and spit on once. I did get hit a few times, but I don't remember how many. It was significantly less than usual, though. And THAT is called making progress. All of this happened each time she was told "no". No, you cannot have gummy fruits for breakfast. No, you cannot destroy the puzzle that your brother just spent an hour putting together. No, we do not pinch the dog's ears. As a friend pointed out, there is a power struggle going on. Nandini wants to be Top Dog. Queen Bee. Ruler of the Roost. And it ain't gonna happen. So, that's really where all this comes in. She's not so much a violent child, but more of a child who does violent things to test my reaction. Every time she bites or spits or slaps me, she then looks me dead in the eyes (ah, at least there's eye contact!) and she waits for my reaction. And I don't react. At least not anymore. In t...

Well, actually nothing is new with us. I just didn't know how to title this post. I guess I could have just put in "Our Family Update". But I didn't. So, I hope I didn't get anyone too excited - thinking that we had something wonderful to share. Nope. Sorry. We didn't win the lottery. I'm not preggers. Nandini and Eli still hate each other. There's really nothing to tell. Well, unless you consider Noah pooping once a day exciting. 'Cause we had a serious issue for a while. We're all quite excited about it. All my kids are now proud members of the Once a Day club. I'm thinking about getting a bumper sticker. What do you think? Let's see. What else? Okay, so I went to Austin this past week. 5 days on my own. It.Was.Fantastic. I really, truly needed it. I feel absolutely refreshed and rejuvenated. I got zero sleep though. The hotel had cable. And I ended up doing all-nighters watching John & Kate Plus 8. You know the show I'm talki...

I have to be honest. I have the BEST husband in the world. And one of the best things about him is that he is a FANTASTIC father. I cannot imagine wanting anyone else to be the father of my children. God truly has blessed me with Simeon. I asked everyone what they love about their Daddy and this is what they said: Noah: (He smiled really big) Nandini: Play, Daddy. Play!!! Eli: I like it when Daddy fix my shark and we go on the boat. He's my best friend of all and loves dinosaurs. I love it when Daddy lets me out of time out when Mommy puts me in because I got in big trouble. That's all. I have nothing else to say. Mommy: I love your Daddy because he is super duper and loads of fun. I'm the luckiest girl in the world. He puts up with my moods and gives the absolute best foot rubs in the world. Also, he's letting me go to Austin for five days all by myself so that I can get special training on how to work with Noah. Speaking of which, I have to leave in an hour!!! Gotta ...

We just came back from our local carnival. You know, one of those travelling carnival things that sets up in abandoned shopping center parking lots. The ones that are sometimes in the news because a kid fell out of a faulty ferris wheel or because it turns out that one of the ride attendants is a sex offender. Yeah, one of those. We just got back from one of those. I think Simeon is ready to move. You see, Sim works in Irving. He travels an hour and a ha lf to get to work every day. That’s an hour and a half closer to normal. He doesn’t really get to see all the colorful characters that live in this little town. Now, I like colorful. Colorful is good. It would be boring if everyone was the same. But having all the colorful characters converge into one place…. Well, it’s a tad bit overwhelming. If any of our Sheffield friends are reading this, Sim says that it reminds him of Barnsley. Ouch. So, anyway, Sim had a scowl on his face the moment we went in there. It ...

If you don't understand the title of of this post, then I feel like a fool. Go run to the nearest Blockbuster ASAP and rent The Princess Bride - because you're missing out on an important piece of pop culture. Actually, Sim and I are sitting here at 9:00 in this Sunday morning, drinking our coffee, and watching The Princess Bride in honor of our 12th wedding anniversary. Obviously, the tie that binds us together is the fact that we are both huge dorks. 12 years. Can you believe it!! I'm sure almost all you thought it would never last. And it so easily could've just been a fleeting college romance. I mean, we met while I was doing a semester exchange in England. But it turned into Wuv, twue wuv and I ended up staying in Sheffield and then Sim moved to Texas and the rest is marriage history. TWELVE YEARS!!! That's, like, 84 in dog years. That, my friend, is a looooooooooong time. But what other way to go through life with your twue wuv , huh? I wouldn't want i...

Guess what I got to do last Saturday night? Go out with the Girls!!! Dinner and a movie. In the Big D. That would be Dallas to all you non-Texans. It was a pretty interesting experience. I had a great time, but the best part was that I learned a very important life lesson. You see, I unnecessarily got all worked up over the fact that I had nothing to wear, my hair had too much gray, I’d eaten too much fast food that week, and that I’d have nothing to say with this group of friends – who, by the way, are all young, rich, and single. All right. So they are all my ex-students from when I worked at TWU , and they LOVE me. Not enough to share any of that young, rich, and single money that they’ ve been earning. But enough to ask me to come out for the last three years – and, which, I’ ve said no to each time. But this time, they said they’d pay. And how on earth could I say no to that? But here’s the problem. Have any of you seen me lately? I’m not exactly the picture of hotness. I’ ve g...

Four years ago, my friend Tammy lost her little girl, Marcail. It was very sudden and unexpected - and I will never, ever forget receiving the call from her husband, John. Marcail was a beautiful little girl. She was adopted from Kolkata, India - from the same orphanage that Noah was from, and she had been home for just six short months. That's the same time that Nandini's been home, and I can't even imagine losing her. It's unthinkable. Tammy was so incredibly in love with Marcail. I've never seen a happier family.... On Saturday, Tammy sent out this letter in memory of Marcail and it included a really beautiful and sweet slideshow. With her permission, she's letting me post it here... Today marks 4 years that we lost our angel. I wanted to do something special for her and have worked on this for sometime for today. http://www.slide.com/r/n092rM4m5j-xxvjV4LCZOHYm1Yc13pdp?previous_view=mscd_embedded_url&view=original Marcail is the most beautiful child I h...