Not Sleeping Again
I know I should wait to write a blog entry... I'm so tired and feel very depressed and so I'm sure I'm just going to moan and lament - but I haven't updated in a week, so thought I'd better write.
Noah is not sleeping again. I don't understand what's going on. For two weeks he slept 12-14 hours a day and his shrieking decreased by 90%. But for the last week, he's getting worse and worse. Thursday night, he did not go to bed until 6:30 am. Yeah - you read right. 6:30!! And he went to bed last night at 9:00 and has been up since 2:30 - shrieking. He shrieked for 3 1/2 hours straight. I'm about to pull my hair out. And he starts school today. We have to leave in a little over an hour and guess what? Oh yeah. He went back to sleep about 10 minutes ago.
This is just nuts. I am trying so hard to figure out what is causing this. This is just back to where we were in TN. So.. .we did pull the carpet up and put down new floor. We got the lock-in, no-glue wood floor to keep it all as chemical free as possible. We did have some people come out and clean our air ducts and they sprayed some nasty medicine-y smelly type of concoction in our air vents. But I can't smell it anymore. Is this what it is?
My word. Just put that boy in a bubble. What's a mom to do?
So, I'm all upset about him starting school anyway. I just don't see how any school or any teacher is equipped to deal with Noah's needs. Teachers are overworked as it is and have several different students with several different special needs - how can one teacher and an aide do any 1:1 and actually teach the kids to learn? It's impossible. I mean, I have faith in teachers. But I think teaching special ed must be the hardest job in the world. I have a hard enough time with one Noah. Can you imagine having 10 of them?
Anyway, I'm trying to organize myself so that maybe we can homeschool starting in January. I'm still researching it. I know I can do it - but Noah has got to start sleeping first. And his diet and supplements and therapies would be so much easier to manage if he were home. I'm just scared to death to send him off. It makes me sick just to think of it. Okay, I can't even write about it anymore because it's making my stomach hurt. And this isn't even kindergarten, folks! This is PPCD - a preschool for kids with special needs. Can you imagine what the first day of kindergarten would be like??
By the way, Noah turned 5 last week. It was bittersweet. We started autism interventions when he was 19 months old and we had such big dreams. We just knew he'd recover by the time he was 3. Then it was 4. Then it was 5. We had no idea he'd still be in diapers - that'd he still be silent and not talking. And all of the other kids who started back when we did - they're getting better. And better. And better. And we are at such a slow pace. I'm not even sure you could call it a snail's pace. Where slower than that!
He's such a sweet kid, though. He's the love and joy of my life. Both my boys are. I just adore them both so much. It's just hard sometimes. It's so much better with a good night's sleep. It's the not sleeping and shrieking that do me in. I get a raging headache from it. It's just that I don't understand what we're doing wrong. We've done everything that everyone else has done - and more - and we just keep backsliding. What gives?
Okay, so take all of this with a grain of salt. I am seriously sleep deprived and nervous about sending him to school. I feel like I'm handing him over to an executioner or something.
On a plus note, I have used these last 4 hours to update Noah's PECS book. It's a picture system that we started 2 years ago, but stopped because we couldn't keep Eli out of them. He was a baby then and tried to eat all of the cards. Anyway, it should give Noah a means of communication and maybe - well, definitely - this will help him out loads. It's going to take sooooooooo much patience and time, but will be really worth it once he gets it down. Please pray that I have the patience to teach it to him and that he actually picks it up. That would mean a lot to us.
Happy Monday! (Good grief. Is it only Monday?)
Noah's Mom
Noah is not sleeping again. I don't understand what's going on. For two weeks he slept 12-14 hours a day and his shrieking decreased by 90%. But for the last week, he's getting worse and worse. Thursday night, he did not go to bed until 6:30 am. Yeah - you read right. 6:30!! And he went to bed last night at 9:00 and has been up since 2:30 - shrieking. He shrieked for 3 1/2 hours straight. I'm about to pull my hair out. And he starts school today. We have to leave in a little over an hour and guess what? Oh yeah. He went back to sleep about 10 minutes ago.
This is just nuts. I am trying so hard to figure out what is causing this. This is just back to where we were in TN. So.. .we did pull the carpet up and put down new floor. We got the lock-in, no-glue wood floor to keep it all as chemical free as possible. We did have some people come out and clean our air ducts and they sprayed some nasty medicine-y smelly type of concoction in our air vents. But I can't smell it anymore. Is this what it is?
My word. Just put that boy in a bubble. What's a mom to do?
So, I'm all upset about him starting school anyway. I just don't see how any school or any teacher is equipped to deal with Noah's needs. Teachers are overworked as it is and have several different students with several different special needs - how can one teacher and an aide do any 1:1 and actually teach the kids to learn? It's impossible. I mean, I have faith in teachers. But I think teaching special ed must be the hardest job in the world. I have a hard enough time with one Noah. Can you imagine having 10 of them?
Anyway, I'm trying to organize myself so that maybe we can homeschool starting in January. I'm still researching it. I know I can do it - but Noah has got to start sleeping first. And his diet and supplements and therapies would be so much easier to manage if he were home. I'm just scared to death to send him off. It makes me sick just to think of it. Okay, I can't even write about it anymore because it's making my stomach hurt. And this isn't even kindergarten, folks! This is PPCD - a preschool for kids with special needs. Can you imagine what the first day of kindergarten would be like??
By the way, Noah turned 5 last week. It was bittersweet. We started autism interventions when he was 19 months old and we had such big dreams. We just knew he'd recover by the time he was 3. Then it was 4. Then it was 5. We had no idea he'd still be in diapers - that'd he still be silent and not talking. And all of the other kids who started back when we did - they're getting better. And better. And better. And we are at such a slow pace. I'm not even sure you could call it a snail's pace. Where slower than that!
He's such a sweet kid, though. He's the love and joy of my life. Both my boys are. I just adore them both so much. It's just hard sometimes. It's so much better with a good night's sleep. It's the not sleeping and shrieking that do me in. I get a raging headache from it. It's just that I don't understand what we're doing wrong. We've done everything that everyone else has done - and more - and we just keep backsliding. What gives?
Okay, so take all of this with a grain of salt. I am seriously sleep deprived and nervous about sending him to school. I feel like I'm handing him over to an executioner or something.
On a plus note, I have used these last 4 hours to update Noah's PECS book. It's a picture system that we started 2 years ago, but stopped because we couldn't keep Eli out of them. He was a baby then and tried to eat all of the cards. Anyway, it should give Noah a means of communication and maybe - well, definitely - this will help him out loads. It's going to take sooooooooo much patience and time, but will be really worth it once he gets it down. Please pray that I have the patience to teach it to him and that he actually picks it up. That would mean a lot to us.
Happy Monday! (Good grief. Is it only Monday?)
Noah's Mom
Comments
I am so sorry to hear that Noah is having a rough time again. I know it must be so discouraging for you after he was having so many good days, sleeping, responding to things you ask him. Perhaps the stuff they sprayed in the air ducts is affecting him and like with the cigarette smell your sense of smell has just gotten use to it??
Noah is a precious beautiful smile and God has great plans for him. I just know it but I know how nice it would be for you if God would give you a hint of his plans for Noah, right? (o:
I wanted you to know that I think about Naoh alot and everytime he comes to my mind I pray for you, Simeon and Noah and little Eli too.
Give Naoh 5 birthday kisses from the Rays. I also wanted to say that you might be pleasantly surprised with the preschool. I have worked as an aide in many different places although all of my work has been as a classroom aide. Is it possible for you to ask for a personal aide for Noah.In the school system I worked in last year there was 2 students with Autism and each one of them had a personal aide. This was a public school though so maybe that is the difference. In fact, I just subbed in the same school today in the kdg. and a little boy there has a personal aide. There are also personal aides for children in the preschool.
Leveta--thinking of you all and sending hugs and wishing there was more I could do
Sorry I meant to say "recious beautiful child" not smile although I am sure his smile is precious!
Levta
Wanted you to know that I have been thinking about all of you and praying that this week is going better for all of you.
Leveta