Recovering Noah

Ahhh , here I sit. August 17 th and it's my 37 th birthday - and let me tell you... this year has been a year of reflection. I think I finally started to understand myself this past year. Sounds silly, maybe. I mean how can you live 36 years and not understand yourself... but it's like things just started making sense. My wants, my needs, my personality, my parenting skills, what I can handle and can't handle, letting go, dreaming big.... all of it just started to click this past year. And I don't have all the answers.... I think that's obvious. But I'm starting to feel a bit at peace with myself and who I am. I still worry, though. A LOT. Especially about the kids. Especially about Noah. And I still sometimes mourn the life I thought I was supposed to have... but it's not as bad as I thought it would be. And that's why I thought that on my 37 th birthday I'd write a letter to myself at thirty. Because thirty was a very difficult year in my life. ...

One of my favorite blogs is doing a “ Letter to Myself at age 20 ” and I couldn't resist. So, here we go! Dear Leslie. Sweet little Leslie. I know that you’re having a rough time right now, but I want you to know that this year – your 20th year – is going to be one of the most life changing years of your life. This is the year that sets you on the course of your future. But that happens towards the last half of your 20th year. The first half basically just sucks. Look, I know that you’re heartbroken right now. But trust me when I tell you that in six months time, you will be living in England and dating the man that you’re going to spend the rest of your life with. The One-That-Broke-Your-Heart ? Forget him!! I wish I could take the pain away, but, honey, I can’t. Your broken heart is what propels you to toss your cares aside and move overseas. If I stop you from that pain, you will never leave. And what’s across the ocean is wonderful. It really is. In the meantime,...